The Teenage Drama Queen

"JUST ADMIT IT. YOU'RE GONNA NEED ME LIKE A BAD HABIT"

You.

June 3, 2009

 

 

 

 

You. The very mention of your name make girls swoon over… so when you told me you loved me, it was as if time was at a stand still… as if all the alcohol I have drunk was racing to my head and conspiring to make it explode.

 

 

You. Synonymous to player, babaero, manloloko. So when you told me you loved me it was as if the world made the biggest joke… and I was unfortunate enough to be the butt of it.

 

 

Drink alcohol.

 

 

You. Pursued me and with every attempt I made to evade your charms I was getting sucked by an all consuming black hole. And as was inevitable I gave in.

 

 

Drink alcohol.

 

 

You. The perfect trophy. Shining with all your glory. Handsome and rich… and that was your only purpose to me, a trophy. But as moments pass that I spent in your arms, I knew that I couldn’t fool anyone. Not even myself.

 

 

Drink alcohol.

 

 

You. Say the words I want to hear… your expression of your love move me to tears. Why has life decided to be so cruel to me? Why can’t I suppress this feeling that I have for you that has grown so completely awry?

 

 

Drink alcohol.

 

 

You. Are my self-torture device. That I myself have chosen to turn on… and you made the first step turning it off… as I was crying myself to sleep one night for the pain was to unbearable, you were there and without a single word you held me cradled me in your arms telling me that you would never leave me and you’d be sure to fight anything that would hurt me… chase away all my fears as your eyes were drenched as well in tears… at that moment the pain was gone… even the stupid hangover that I’ve grown not to mind. “Never leave me” you said, “chase away all my fears” you said. But didn’t you know that act had already chased my fears away. Because that was all I wanted… for you not to leave. The tears rolling down your cheeks were all the sincerity I could ever ask for…

 

 

You. Make me believe in chances. As I woke up with your eyes intently watching me, as you gently kissed my forehead I thought to myself maybe, just maybe you really do love me… with that one thought I smiled. He smiled as well, saying “I think I’m in love with an insane woman! One minute she’s crying, smiling the next.” And then he giggled, my God! How adorable the sound he made! Then seriousness in his face returned “why were you crying?” silence. “Fine! If you won’t tell me why you were crying at least tell me why you were smiling.” Silence. “Maybe” he said “you shouldn’t drink anymore.” And I said “I’d give up anything for you.” He smiled then kissed me… but in my heart it answered: “You. You were the reason for everything. The torture. And thankfully, finally the delight.”

 

 

I know what I am facing is not an actual guaranteed happiness. But I also know this feeling is much better!

 

*smiles*

Posted by kohfee at 8:34 pm | permalink

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"Kohfee EXPRESS :)) WARNING!! It may cause great insanity.



iM nOt thAt fAmOus . . .
yEt nOt thAt rUdE . . .
iM jUst a 'khyuU gaL' wiD AttidUdE . . .
iM nOt thAt bAd . . .
yEt nOt thAt guD . . .
hOmEGiRLz aLtOgEthEr nOw . . .
N d hOoD . . .
- i AlwayS wAntEd 2 b frEe -
- 2 fLy awAy & nvr rEturN -
- 2 soar hiGh up higH -
-`tL d hiEgHt mAy nEveR bE sEen -
- bUt thEn sOmEwhErE bEyOnD thAt wAnT -
- i lOnGeD tO bE OwnED 2 b hELd -
- anD 2 nvr bEen eT gO. . . . -

-  SiLy mE -

-old Mr. Webster can never define me.
 -don't try to tell me who I am because I already know
 -memories mean everything.
 -there’s no place like elsewhere.
 -without him, life would be a lot easier. But it will also be a lot emptier.
 -love will always stain, just like blood.
 -COMPUTER plays a big part in my life.
 -laughter isn’t always the best medicine. It can kill. :))
 -I don’t have to tell you that I’m sad. But be sure to notice it. Because the more you show your feelings, the more people can find ways to hurt you.
 -I trust someone by a hair's breadth.
 -he’s my fairytale, a dream when I’m not sleeping; a wish upon a star that came true.
 -there’s always a happy ending in a real life fairytale. You juz hav 2w8.
 -an apple a day keeps the doctor away. But if the doctor is cute, screw the fruit. HAHA!
 -everyone experiences a dramatic scene in their life.
 -hiding my emotion is where I’m not good at. You cant easily recognize when I’m not ok. (That’s for people who dont really know me.)
 -the scariest thing is being alone.
 -adventure is what I’m searching for.
 -I dream big :)
 -in the end, you’ll be happy. And if you’re not happy, then it’s not the end.
 -daydreaming is what I love. HAHA!
 -I am listed under CRAZY.
 -colored photographs show the color of your clothes. Black & white photographs show the color of your soul.
 -DRINKING IS DANGEROUS FOR YOUR HEALTH :)) So quit drinking?
 -Nytout is so much fun.
 -you will find me editing pictures the whole day.
 -I was a ‘natural stubborn’ :)).Why I couldn’t help it??
 -MUSIC is my drug.
 -TIME is gold. So I’m always on time. HAHAHA! (For sure maraming aangal jan!)
 -COKE!COKE!COKE Wala lang! Gusto ko ng COKE eh.
 -be a modern EMO?. Don’t juz wait, u have to search also. Tama ba? HAHAHA!
 -star light, star bright, I found MR.RIGHT. I stay up and think of him every night. And I love when he holds me tight.
 -I love my life, family and friends.
 -And lastly I don’t suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it. :))
 -FLASH A SMILE!

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